I just read a book by Dr. Izzy Justice called Recovering the Spirit of Management. It's a great book with a lot of helpful exercises. In the book, he talks about how the people we encounter everyday either add to or subtract from our emotional bank accounts. For example, when we encounter a rude person while waiting for our coffee at Starbuck's, this has the potential to deplete our emotional bank account. These withdrawals and deposits have a cumulative effect over the course of the day. If we start out bad, it tends to snowball until the whole day is rotten.

On Thursday of last week, I was scheduled for a Salvation Army pick-up. I have a number of things to donate. This was the third time that I was scheduled. After the first two pick-ups didn't work out, I got frustrated and cancelled. Now, several months later and with a stockpile in the basement, I was willing to try again. I called to see if my pick-up would be in the first half of the day or the second. To my utter chagrin, the man who was helping me, John, told me that there had been some mix-up and we would have to re-schedule. I took a very deep breath to calm myself (because I wanted to scream!). I will never know what my response to this news would have been because in that tiny space of the deep breath something happened: I heard this man's boss start screaming like a maniac. And, I do mean maniac! He was berating John, he was berating the other office worker, he was berating the stupid drivers – everyone! I could hear John take a deep breath. Then he calmly came back on the line and said, "I'm really sorry about this mistake. Can I schedule you for tomorrow?" I told him that that would be just fine.

In this interaction, John and I both had choices to make. John could have allowed his boss's rancor to carry over in how he communicated with me. He made the marvelously emotionally intelligent decision not to do that. I could have allowed my frustration with the now three missed pick-ups to affect the way I communicated to John. When I heard that there was yet another mix-up, I could feel my emotional bank account being depleted. However, because of the interaction that John and I had, it was a temporary withdrawal and didn't have to affect the rest of my day. I can only hope that it helped John as well.

As you go through your day, pay attention to what adds to or subtracts from your emotional bank account. For those things that deplete you, how can you put a "stop payment" on that transaction so as not to allow it to become a permanent depletion?

To Your Success,

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