When you are trying to show off, be careful about what you are actually showing.
Bobbi Kahler

Years ago, I worked at a fairly good size law firm. Among the many roles I had there, one of my roles was to "break-in" the new attorneys fresh out of law school. They knew the law, but they had no idea how to be a lawyer; they didn't know how to get something on the docket or how to prepare pleadings, etc. They also felt this tremendous pressure to look smart.

I once had a first year associate hand me a document for review. I read it, went back to her and said, "Do you know what this sentence means?" The sentence was full of Latin phrases, which were highly contradictory. She sheepishly admitted that she didn't know what it meant (even though she wrote it!). I gently asked her why she had included it. She said, "Well, the plaintiff's brief (we were the defense) used a lot of them so I thought I should include them too." Eventually she came around but most of the new associates had to go through a period like this. Luckily for me, most of the associates I worked with in this manner were usually very grateful: I didn't mock them, I didn't make them feel like idiots, and, most importantly, I kept them from looking like idiots in front of the partners!

This experience reinforced something that I have often heard: speak only when it improves upon the silence. Another – and perhaps nicer way of saying that is – make sure that what you are about to say really adds value for the other person. Have you ever had a salesperson keep talking long after they made the sale and up to the point where they actually lost the sale? Have you ever been that salesperson? Most highly effective salespeople speak far less and listen far more than do struggling salespeople.

Abraham Lincoln was so keenly aware of the power of the spoken word that he refused to speak extemporaneously about anything that was of great importance. He knew that if he even slightly mis-spoke, he could jeopardize the entire initiative.

When you are communicating with your team, your clients, or your prospects are you talking because you want to talk or because there is something that they need to hear?

To Your Success,

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