Category: Rise & Thrive

Have you ever had an arch-rival?
I have.
Her name was Sherri.
We were in the 6th grade and we battled for everything.
Cheerleading
Softball
Volleyball
Top grades
I usually won. But one day it was bothering me how when I would go out for a new sport, Sherri would then decide to go out for the same sport. I was complaining to my mom about it.
Then she said the following game-changing wise words:

It’s never too late to tell yourself a new story about your past.
The stories we tell ourselves about our past become limits on our happiness and success.
They are self-fulfilling prophecies.
If you once bombed in a presentation, you might tell yourself the story that you really blew it and that you are just not good at presentations.

Why are we so quick to set aside a proven track record of “good” behavior, and instead trust the aberration of a single misstep? Can anyone survive such a tightrope? Today I share an insight that I’ve learned in having coached more than 3000 people regarding this destructive phenomenon.

A couple of months ago, I was talking to Rick about something with my dad. Dad’s getting a little older, and, of course, I want to make sure that he’s as healthy as he can be. I caught myself saying the following:
“I’m really stressed about dad.”
And then I stopped myself and I thought. Wait a minute. Is that true?

“I’m really stressed about dad.”
And then I stopped myself and I thought. Wait a minute. Is that true?

It turned into a nasty scene.
It was completely unnecessary.
And, it happened out of the blue.
Rick and I were getting ready to back out of our parking space at a Target. That’s when we heard the commotion directly behind us.
I quickly turned to see what was going on.

During a summer road trip back in 2001, Rick and I were towing a camper through Idaho, on a narrow, winding road.
There was a loud pop from the rear passenger side. A blown tire on the camper!
At almost the precise moment that we heard the pop – and felt the camper start to sway — a wide and long turnout appeared on our side of the road.

I was recently on a flight to Orlando for a client. My first in-person workshop in more than 2 years. I wasn’t thrilled with my flight selection as I was getting in at 5:55 p.m. and that’s a bit later than I prefer.
When I travel for work, I like to arrive early enough to get a workout in, grab dinner and relax and then get to bed early so that I’m rested and energized in the morning.

My 89-year old father LOVES going for drives with me. This is a picture of our favorite lunch spot: the Kankakee River that we both grew up on.
We watch the geese and the gulls, and he tells me stories of his boyhood adventures on this water.
As we drive home, he often falls asleep. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Maybe It depends on our framing. 

How much of your day is filled with “tasks to be completed?”
I recently realized how much that orientation had crept into my life.
We are vacationing in Arkansas and one of the houses that we are renting is really decorated in a lovely way. The master bedroom, in particular, is a retreat.
On Saturday morning, I was making the bed and – for some reason –